Outside the Comfort Zone

Have you ever said no to something because…

You had never tried it?

It looked dangerous?

Your mother would have said not to do it?

As part of my husband’s birthday celebration, my family tried a high ropes adventure park. After a too-brief, crash course on how to hook and unhook the safety harness, we climbed up to a platform to start a medium-difficult course. No beginner easy stuff for us!

With these tree-top adventures, one moves from tree platform to tree platform by crossing high-wire cables, ropes, and suspended, moving boards. This course included two zip lines. While I am not afraid of heights, I am extra cautious on a ladder these days. This level was easily 25-30 feet off the ground. The safety harness totally prevents you from falling to the ground when you lose your balance (which happens all the time), but my brain had a hard time believing it.

Halfway through the second section of the course, my husband became frozen with fear. In all honesty, it was truly scary. About twenty 1 x 3s, each about 2 feet long, were suspended at their ends from swinging cables, with about 18 inches between each board. As you stepped off one board (which is swinging), you stepped onto another that moves away from you. Remember doing the splits? That’s a pretty close description.

My husband could not get past the mental fear, despite the harness, and had to be lowered to the ground by staff. I know when I crossed that section ahead of him, I had overwhelming terror. The final part of the section curves upward, so not only are the boards swinging, but you are also trying to climb an incline. Nerve-wracking does not even come close. At one point, I couldn’t breathe.

However, once I made it across, something clicked. I could remember other times when I was frightened to the point of immobility- skiing down a blue hill for the first time, jumping off a cliff on a rope swing into a river, my one and only time scuba diving. Each time, I was frozen with fear.

I survived those moments. And in each instance, the risk of injury was much higher. Here, even if I slipped, the harness would catch me. There was no downside to this course other than my own fear.

I could embrace the feeling and the challenge, or let fear take over.

As I waited for my daughter to catch up to me, the thought popped into my head: what would I do in other parts of my life, like writing, if I knew I couldn’t fall (i.e.,fail)? Most of us don’t risk trying certain things because we see or suspect a downside. We opt for safety- safety from getting hurt, humiliated, or frustrated. It’s human nature not to want to fail.

I don’t bungee jump because I have heard too many stories about broken necks.

Same with skydiving- I’m satisfied that I no longer panic when I get on a plane. I have no interest in jumping out of one.

But I swim in the ocean even though I have seen a large shark up close.

I bike even though my daughter had a horrific bike accident.

All this went through my mind while I stared at the next zip line —it was the longest I had ever tried, and at the other end, I would have to land and run up an incline to reach the tree.

Behind me, I heard my daughter say. “You got this!”

I counted to three and picked up my feet—I was immediately flying. The speed was thrilling. And I landed with a smile.

My husband did join us for an easier challenge, and I even went a third time on a trail run that included 4 zip lines and a moving wall-climbing section.

I now understand how some people get addicted to high adventure- it is so empowering to complete a challenge that seems beyond personal limits. I won’t lie- my 70-year-old body gave me a pretty strong reprimand the next day. But I think the soreness came more from hanging on too tight in the beginning- my muscles reacted to the tension. Once I let go of the fear and gained confidence, the sections got easier to do.

Maybe I am imagining the spill over, but this week I got up the courage and confidence to start sending out my middle-grade nonfiction proposal. The worst that can happen is a publisher says “no thanks”- it’s not like I will fall 30 feet and break my neck.